Wednesday, June 22, 2005 / 10:57 PM
***********FiNaLLy**************
Well,well let me see...finally i have the mood to write an entry...well maybe because finally i got stuff to yack about ;)gee thats many of the word "finally" in juz one sentence.. ?_?
let me see...wat shalli yack abt first?actually its pretty easy..shall start wif the heart..GUess wat!!i finally start to feel crushes for real again!!wOoHoo thats a great achievement aft wat happened..shant yack abt the past..moving to the present..i have a crush on this guy..he's juz a high n bye frend i made wen i first entered poly..unfortunately at tt point of time he was in a relationship...so had no chance to get to noe him better as a frend...coz the gal wld be looking over him like an owl..hehez kidding...
well nowadaes havent seen him wif his gal...many occasions not even once wif the gal...so suspecting they aint together..k aint gonna bother that much..but however by knowing that...my heart sumwat starts to develop a crush on him..hes cute,goatie(my pre-condition),muscular(just rite) and that killer smile...unique tOO.. :) well aint sure how long the crush gonna last...will be able to break my longest record of 4 yrs?? well juz have to wait and see..Me waiting for a chance that i can have to get to know him better...not asking for anything though...maybe juz wanna be one friend richer?! true love forms over time...aint gonna gif a tok abt love...its complicated enuf...
ps:Fate mind helping me out here...u helped me once...u can carry out ya charm again...oh ya...but this time dun leave me a scarred heart ;)thanks...
okie i now thats lame but it doesnt hurt to ask...
****schOoL****
schS fun but also boring...aint sure why sumtimes i find it boring...i dun seem to feel the vibe of schooL..The spirit of it juz aint there...CLass...class is super fun :D hmmz newbies in there..a.k.a senthil,jairui and nissa..senthil cant technically be called a newbie coz i know him from debates..*sigh*...nissa juz to demure n quiet...Jai ruI hmmz he looks abit like a gal..no offense..nice bunch of ppl..Oh ya not forget my best buddies...hasyer,val n all..
okie i m beat tired now..wanna write abt the fun stuff of debates todae in this entry but i all drained out..so till next time...
ps:if there are grammatically and spelling errors plz forgive me..COZ i juz typed it once and tOO lazY to read n check it again ;)
*
Saturday, June 18, 2005 / 12:16 AM
~QuEstiOns..~
Had a chat wif someone..And found out many many many interesting stuff abt someone..Din expect to find out that much in one single convo.N information provide sumwat makes me feel abit cheated yet abit relieved.."ActorS","LiArS" seem to fit alot into my life recently.Perhasps maybe i m too nice to be tOld the truth..But why cant they understand that lying itself is bad no matter be it if u gonna see it for a a good cause..Till today i am waiting for a truth that mite neber prevailed..but i think that one is juz enuf..I DUN need anymore..hahaz...well i guess that juz human nature..cant really do much abt it..
~TrUSt~
TrUSt!! a significant element in life that can neither be bought nor sold.Trust builds over time span wen we get to know that certain someone...and in the case of family ones..trust is auto-built..But that doesnt mean it cant be destroyed...Leaving the context of trust among immediate family members aside for wat i m gonna say now..
Came to realise again that no matter how well u noe that someone,trust among both parties aint alwayz full-prOoF..meaning to say that there are lOoP holes..was shocked that it happened to me..feel very pist wen i realise that abit of my secret or very well of it has been leaked out..No poInt brooding over it..coz wats done is done...i cant erase those words rite?
Lessons learned...neber reallie trust everyone??
Wednesday, June 15, 2005 / 10:49 PM
Suddenly fallen in this song again
FInd the lyrics very meaningful..and can applied in my context..
hahaz wanna blog but juz tOO shagged...soo juz gonna leave u guys with the lyric to the song..
It seemed to be like the perfect thing for you & me.
It's so ironic you're what I had pictured you to be
But there are facts in our lives we can never change
Just tell me that you understand & you feel the same
This perfect romance that I've created in my mind
I'd live a thousand lives each one with you right by my side
But yet we find ourselves in a less than perfect circumstance
And so it seems like we'll never have the chance
Ain't it funny how some feelings you just can't deny
And you can't move on even though you try
Ain't it strange when your feeling things you shouldn't feel
Oh , I wish this could be real
Ain't it funny how a moment could just change your life
And you don't want to face what's wrong or right
Ain't it strange how fate can play a part in the story of your heart
Sometimes I think that a true love can never be
I just believe that somehow it wasn't meant for me
Life can be cruel in a way that I can't explain
And I don't think that I could face it all again
I barely know you but somehow I know what you're about
A deeper love I've found in you & I no longer doubt
You've touched my heart & it altered every plan
I've made And now I feel that I don't have to be afraid
Ain't it funny how some feelings you just can't deny
And you can't moved on even though you try
Ain't it strange when your feeling things you shouldn't feel Oh ,
I wish this could be real
Ain't it funny how a moment could just change your life
And you don't want to face what's wrong or right
Ain't it strange how fate can play a part in the story of your heart
I locked away my heart but you just set it free
Emotions I felt held me back from what my life should be
I pushed you far away & yet you stayed with me
I guess this means that you & me were meant to be
Ain't it funny how some feelings you just can't deny
And you can't moved on even though you try
Ain't it strange when your feeling things you shouldn't feel Oh ,
I wish this could be real
Ain't it funny how a moment could just change your life
And you don't want to face what's wrong or right
Ain't it strange how fate can play a part in the story of your heart
Ain't it funny how some feelings you just can't deny
And you can't moved on even though you try
Ain't it strange when your feeling things you shouldn't feel Oh ,
I wish this could be real Ain't it funny how a momant could just change your life
And you don't want to face what's wrong or right
Ain't it strange how fate can play a part in the story of your heart
Ain't it funny how some feelings you just can't deny
And you can't moved on even though you try
Ain't it strange when your feeling things you shouldn't feel Oh ,
I wish this could be real Ain't it funny how a momant could just change your life
And you don't want to face what's wrong or right
Ain't it strange how fate can play a part in the story of your heart
Thursday, June 09, 2005 / 10:14 PM
I am actually getting sick n tired of this..but aint able to let it all go till i have the f***king reason..sorry abt the language just kinda pist...hmmz accidently opened "the" folder in my hp today..and since i opened it i decided to read thru all the smses again..hahaz instead of feeling those loving feeling i used to get...Now all i feel is anger n sadness..the smses din show a slightly bit of an act...it was soo natural n true...aint gonna crap abt that...BUT seriously...PLS for juz this once.CAN I KNOW THE TRUTH FRM U?DUN U feel slightest bit guilty or slightest bit hurt...ITS not possible to do all u do it and say u din feel at all...if u were acting u wldnt be soo passionate like you were..PLZ JUZ this once...Lifes have been unfair to me...but at least let me know the reason for it being sOO...plz...with the reason i can seriously carry on full on with my life...and not alwayz having that small little part of me crying inside...hahaz...lolz...
ANYWAYz...my frigde went bust!!....haiz...NO COLD water..my companion every nite..NO Butter,no jam...haiz...makes me wanna cry...well i hope it gets fixed soon..plz.. hahaz...lolz everything ard me is going haywire..hahaz negative vibes frm me perhasp?
okie i m out now...till next time :D
Tuesday, June 07, 2005 / 11:05 PM
*heArts*
As the title suggests..its gotta do something with the heart.well matters of the heart..
Been having strange dreams lately..almost everyday.and shldnt be dreaming abt that..wonder why i do tOO..the dreams somewhat eases my heart aches..but when i wake up frm the dream i m literally in tears..hahaz times when the heart yearns for something the mind doesnt consent to?
today i feel abit sad.hahaz its because someone said i was thin..not at the fact that i m thin..but the fact that even though ppl noe me,and noe that i m like that no matter how much i eat,still passed that remark.hmmz its not wrong to say wat u wanna say..but can ppl tell me something that i dun noe??PPL i noe i m not sized like a normal teenager..i m petite and i like the way i m..I EAT for godness sakes!!sometimes even more then u ppl..Why cant some of u out there face the fact that i have to privillege to eat all i want n not put on weight...
frankly speaking its starting to hurt me now wen ppl i noe say this kinda stuff...do i go ard saying "hey ur a fat manz" or "hey u put on some pounds since the last i saw ya?" I DUN DO THAT.I DONT SEE PPL DOING THAT..so why does it go to be done to the
hortizonally challenged ppl?
well it just hurts that even though i have no problems of being thin and that, its not a choice..ppl pass remarks soo easily as though i wanna be thin...common manz...try to be more nice...spare the thin ppl out there..
haiz...
Sunday, June 05, 2005 / 11:29 PM
I actually got lotsa stuff to blog but juz aint in the mood,nevertheless i shall just try..
wOrk~Friday
I went back to work on friday n boy work was light on that day...=D...thanks to it being sch holiday i guess..anywayz now i can help student recite b4 the start doing their work..Hehez...And there was this boy that came to me for reading.Boy he was very mischevious..He tried to cheat me on timing for reading...He wld keep the stopwatch close to himself and take false reading,haiz..and when i tried to hold his hand so that he wont play wif the stopwatch he started playing wif my ring...I was like.."bOy dont play already...be good,read n then u can go home" LOlz...and he chose not to listen to me and continued being playful..BUT i managed to get him to read the passages.While trying to do so,he played not only with my ring but my fingernails..
haiz...cheeky little boy...and before leaving,he pretended to drop his eraser and tickled my foot.haiz...Lolz...funny manz.
Saturday i went to work too..just for a few hrs in the morning..Did normal stuff,marking and al..
and tOday another boy who was playful was under my charge for maths recitation..He was sp cute n playful..he was not looking at the worksheet while reciting but he was staring at my face..Lolz..and the best thing was that he turned angelic wen the instructor came n stand next to him..hehez..well at least he made my day..a smile early in the morning..
~Sunday
Went to places today..aint gonna blog details of where..but just gonna blog abt sumthing that happened at tekka.went to tekka...mom wanted to get prayer stuff n all..so while mom was shopping me and dad,juz stood outside of our car alongside the pavements.While waiting...my eyes caught glimpse of this guy,he was wif his mouth...and there was juz something abt his smile..we were both literally staring at each other for long..hahaz...i like his smile alot..but aft awhile i decided to stop..sumthing juz went aross my mind..but wen i turned again..i saw him stealing glances...lolz...nice smile manz...unfortunately no goatie...haiz...but well...gd sign at least i m having mini crushes... :D anywayz thats all for now...till the mood come again :D
Wednesday, June 01, 2005 / 9:15 PM
**YuppiEs**
Its finally a new month..A bright start so far..No sad feelings yet but feeling tired.SchOOl just began and i am trying to get into the schOOl routine and trying to adjust my biological clOck so that i wont feel soo shagged everytime i reach home from school.basically my modules are appealing to me.Lots of networkings..YuPpie...hahaz programming-->cher is kind enuf to explain in lay man terms for *BlurS* like me =D.. the light of projects coming in is getting brighter..gotta start loOking for grp members..well actually have a few already..made my verbal promises..
$$$ is literally flowing out of my wallet..*soBs* ma textbks cost like $30 plus..and so far i am supposed to get 3 bks in whOle...ie..abt $100..trying to source out for second hand bks frm my seniors..
*DebAtes*
hMmz i managed to view the finally product of debates video that we made..and..and..and..in the video i sounded like a squeeky mouse..hahaz but overall it was superb...get participation...ThumBs up to the sP debaters!!